The body control is mind-boggling too, resisting lean and allowing you to corner fast and flat. Mid-corner bumps? There must have been some, but the Porsche would rather we didn’t know, simply steam-rolling them into submission. There’s genuine poise and control here, the Coupé behaving like some over-sized Golf R when pedalled with enthusiasm. And because you’re sitting so high up, you can see the road unfold ahead sooner, which partly offsets the vast exterior dimensions.
And it’s fast. By gum is it fast. Porsche claims that the Sport Chrono-equipped Turbo will crack 62mph from a standstill in 3.7sec, which is two-tenths quicker than Cayenne Turbo - although top speed remains unchanged at 177mph. As with the handling, you’ll be hard-pressed to detect the shaved tenths of a second on the road, where the Cayenne remains blisteringly, almost anti-socially, fast.
Peak torque remains at a monstrously high 568lb ft and is available anywhere between 2000 and 4500rpm, which is just where you need it for devastating point-to-point pace. In combination with the slick eight-speed auto that has an uncanny ability to second guess your needs, it allows the Turbo to make mincemeat of the straights between corners and any cars that happen to be in your way, all of which will be left in the wake of your bellowing, belching optional sports exhaust.
Yet for all its speed and ability, the Coupé still isn’t a fun car in the traditional sense. There’s satisfaction to be had from working its precise and honed controls and genuine awe at its otherworldly ability to devour any road you throw at it with such jaw-dropping composure, but the sense of connection isn’t deep enough and there’s always a nagging sense that the car is doing much of the work. But then it is a leviathan SUV and not a stripped-out sports car, so perhaps we’re being unfair.
Arguably a better indication of the sort of use the car is really intended for is revealed when you knock all the settings back. Row back from Sport Plus mode and the Cayenne Coupé is transformed into a hushed, relaxing and extremely rapid GT car. Even on mammoth 20in wheels, there’s a hness to the ride, the air springs adding just enough waft, while only really ragged and torn Tarmac betrays those vast rims, when there’s a slight brittleness to proceedings. It’s quiet too, the outside world relegated to nothing more than a very distant whoosh around the door mirrors and the odd thump from the suspension over a particularly deep pothole or sharp ridge.
Running costs, as you’d expect, are on the steep side. Claimed fuel economy for the Turbo is 20.2mpg, while we saw this drop to near single figures on the harder driven points on our route. It also pumps out quite a lot of CO2, with a quoted maximum of 268g/km.